Welcome to the archived web site of
Will Joel Friedman, Ph.D. Psychologist (1950-2013)
California License No. PSY 10092
 
Specializing in Presence-Centered Therapy
balancing mind and heart, body and spirit

Now in memoriam - This website is no longer being updated
While Dr. Friedman is no longer with us, there are still many helpful resources on his site. Articles and resource links have been relocated to the top. His family hopes you might find them helpful. But since this site is no longer being updated, some links may no longer work.

 


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Articles by Dr. Friedman (except where noted otherwise)

Categorized by Process | Topic

From His Book | Meditations For Life | The Flow of Money, Business and Innovation | Transpersonal/Mind-Body | Approaches, Worldview and Will-isms

Skills For Life: The Core Playing Field | Free the Ego, and You Are Free | Feeling, Thought, Communication & Action

Strategies/Distinctions For Life: The Core Playing Field | Free the Ego, and You Are Free

Awakening Stories/Metaphors For Life: The Core Playing Field | Free the Ego, and You Are Free | The Way It Is

Holiday Family Gatherings | Cartoons, Jokes and Humor | Poems and Quotes | Song Lyrics, Wit and Wisdom

Jokes, Cartoons and Wisdom

The World According to Bill Cosby
 

The comedian and television actor and producer Bill Cosby spins tales from childhood that touches a universal chord. Enjoy his own unique brand of comedy.

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A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.

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A word to the wise ain't necessary-it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

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Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.

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Any man today who returns from work, sinks into a chair, and calls for his pipe is a man with an appetite for danger.

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As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did not put all her eggs in one basket, so to speak: she gave me a younger brother named Russell, who taught me what was meant by "survival of the fittest."

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Because of my father, I thought my name was Jesus Christ. My brother Russell thought that his name was Dammit.

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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!

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Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them.

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Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.

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Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you're telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.

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Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing.

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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

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Gray hair is God's graffiti.

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Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.

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Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.

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I am certainly not an authority on love because there are no authorities on love, just those who've had luck with it and those who haven't.

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I am proud to be an American. Because an American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread.

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I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.

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I wasn't always black. . . there was this freckle, and it got bigger and bigger.

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The problem is that your daughter has given her heart to a 15-year-old boy, and a 15-year-old boy does not yet qualify as a human being.

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I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.

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If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.

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Immortality is a long shot, I admit. But somebody has to be first.

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In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.

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It isn't a matter of black is beautiful as much as it is white is not all that's beautiful.

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Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.

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Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.

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Men and women belong to different species and communications between them is still in its infancy.

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My childhood should have taught me lessons for my own fatherhood, but it didn't because parenting can only be learned by people who have no children.

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Old is always fifteen years from now.

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No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.

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Nothing I've ever done has given me more joys and rewards than being a father to my children.

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Nothing separates the generations more than music. By the time a child is eight or nine, he has developed a passion for his own music that is even stronger than his passions for procrastination and weird clothes.

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Parents are not interested in justice, they're interested in peace and quiet.

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People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what's bitter and move on.

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Poets have said that the reason to have children is to give yourself immortality. Immortality? Now that I have five children, my only hope is that they are all out of the house before I die.

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Raising children is an incredibly hard and risky business in which no cumulative wisdom is gained: each generation repeats the mistakes the previous one made.

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Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.

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The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it.


George Demont Otis      Mt Shasta

That married couples can live together day after day is a miracle that the Vatican has overlooked.

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The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic.

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The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.

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The past is a ghost, the future a dream, and all we ever have is now.

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There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.

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There is no labor a person does that is undignified; if they do it right.

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Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.

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When you become senile, you won't know it.

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Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think-in a deeper voice.

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You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.

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You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who've never had any.

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The three ingredients of a successful union between two. . . humor, commitment and undying love.

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Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you're pouring, or drinking.

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I want to die before my wife, and the reason is this: If it is true that when you die, your soul goes up to judgment, I don't want my wife up there ahead of me to tell them things.

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Did you ever see the customers in health-food stores? They are pale, skinny people who look half dead. In a steak house, you see robust, ruddy people. They're dying, of course, but they look terrific.

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Sigmund Freud once said, "What do women want?" The only thing I have learned in fifty-two years is that women want men to stop asking dumb questions like that.

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In spite of the six thousand manuals on child raising in the bookstores, child raising is still a dark continent and no one really knows anything. You just need a lot of love and luck—and, of course, courage.

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What best defines a child is the total inability to receive information from anything not plugged in.

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Kids will spend $500 on sneakers but won`t spend $200 on "Hooked-on-Phonics".

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If you`re a parent, the five worst words you can say to your children are, "When I was your age. . . " You were NEVER their age. You were older in the womb.

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I can tell you, from experience, that whoever said "Children and fools cannot lie" was one or the other himself. There`s only one way to guarantee that your children are telling the truth: limit your questions to the names of their schools.

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I wanted to give the house back to the parents.

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The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.

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I`m still waiting for some actor to win, say, an Oscar. . . and deliver the following acceptance speech: "I would like to thank my parents, first of all, for letting me live."

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It`s the little things that count when you`re a daddy. Like taking your little girl for ice cream. First, you have to teach her about the concept of gravity. I can`t tell you how many ice creams I`ve had to pick up off the floor, rinse off and stick back on my kid`s cone.

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The problem is that your daughter has given her heart to a 15-year-old boy, and a 15-year-old boy does not yet qualify as a human being.

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No parent must ever say, "Get the kids out of here, I`m trying to watch TV." The father who does start saying this is likely to see one of his children on the 6:00 news.

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People will frighten you about a graduation. . . They use words you don't hear often. . . "And we wish you Godspeed." It is a warning, Godspeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices.

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Children today know more about sex than I or my father did.

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Advertising is the most fun you can have with your clothes on.

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Anyone can dabble, but once you've made that commitment, your blood has that particular thing in it, and it's very hard for people to stop you.

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The fact that I'm not trying to win converts bugs some people, but I don't think an entertainer can. I've never known any white bigot to pay a black man, unless the black man was being hung.

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Nobody ever says, 'Can I have your beets?'

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My eleven-year-old daughter mopes around the house all day waiting for her breasts to grow.

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Dad is great, he gives us the chocolate cake.

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I recently turned fifty, which is young for a tree, mid-life for an elephant, and ancient for a quarter-miler whose son now says, "Dad, I just can't run with you anymore unless I bring something to read.

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Father...knows exactly what those boys at the mall have in their depraved little minds because he once owned such a depraved little mind himself. In fact, if he thinks enough about the plans that he used to have for young girls, the father not only will support his wife in keeping their daughter home but he might even run over to the mall and have a few of those boys arrested.

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[speaking in Washington, DC, to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the Brown vs. Board of Education ruling that eradicated segregated schooling in America] These people marched and were hit in the face with rocks to get an education, and now we`ve got these knuckleheads walking around. The lower economic people are not holding up their end in this deal. These people are not parenting. They are buying things for kids—$500 sneakers for what? I can`t even talk the way these people talk, "Why you ain`t," "Where you is?" You can`t be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth!

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A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.

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She (his wife) is the wind beneath my wings.


George Demont Otis      Mt Tam From Belvedere


 

 


Home | Dedication/Orientation | Articles by Dr. Friedman | Video and Audio Clips | Annotated Resource Links | Psychology Professionals

Dr. Will’s Perspective on Practicing Psychology: Dr. Friedman's Practice | Dr. Friedman's Approach | Therapeutic Purposes | Credentials | Experience | Brochures | Interview | Events and Workshops | Website Disclaimer | Contact